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Stonewalled89

Last goal for our false 3?


TheBlueTango

Absolute disgrace that he will leave without a game as the lone striker up front


Jorgutinho

I hope he will against Watford


TheBlueTango

I pray


BandFromrSoccer

watford on sunday


niceville

I feel like this has gone beyond joking. Nothing about him indicates he’d be a good striker. Strikers have to do a lot more than poach volleys on the left side of goal. For one, they have to use their right foot occasionally!


TheBlueTango

Alonso don't need no right foot Lump ball to the other wing -> Alonso chest controls ball -> keepy-uppy with left knee -> spanks it top bins -> repeat 60 times -> Pichichi trophy


EsotericPlumbus

It's like some people can't see what's right in front of them


Mallonhead

Mate. He scores goals. That's all a striker needs to do. Top 5 striker of a ball in the PL. (Kane/CR7/Son/De Bruyne)


niceville

He scores goals in large part because he’s a wingback poacher at the back post and often unmarked or only has a fullback near him. Not the case if he was a striker with two CBs. Also, can you imagine him dropping to link play, leading the press, holding up the ball? I can’t.


Cowdude179

End of an era, play him as striker in the last game


IP14Y3RI

Our false 3² (It works since he has a 3 on his chest, a 3 on his back, and 3² = 9)


jrryul

Peak Alonso this game.. the good and the bad


Kaljapallo

Good game for Barca fans to see the full package of Alonso


uasE_

>full package of Alonso 🤨


IsItSnowing_

Making sure we don’t forget him if he leaves


fedesan99

Sometimes may be good, sometimes may be shit


Slapstickperk

The duality of Marcos Alonso, all depends, which way on the field, the runs must be made?


dragon8811

Our best striker But that pass from Recce James damnn


Ld511

I remember seeing an argument about who has the best volley on the team and its pretty crazy how all 3 answers were wingbacks


FC37

Ivanovic was great on the volley, too.


DorothyJMan

Cahill scored some cracking volleys as well, and Luiz had that one against United. Defenders often need to hit the ball hard and true, I guess.


Daniiiiii

Rudiger: Hard, yes. True, ehhhhh...


GreenPickledToad

Glad he also got his banger before leaving.


willy-mammoth

Man Cahill scored one or two bangers for us back in the day too. What a player he was


taylorstillsays

Alex needs a mention in this conversation too. Our best strikers from distance this season have been Rudi and Chalobah too


Marshyq

Rudiger has absolutely not been one of our best strikers from a distance, he has one goal from what seems like 50 or so attempts


taylorstillsays

He hasn’t scored a ton, but in term of just striking the ball he’s hit the woodwork multiple times and forced some great saves. His striking technique is pretty good Who would you say has been better this season?


AnnieIWillKnow

The way we attack means our forwards don't take many long shots, as they don't occupy those spaces - which is why our defenders seem to be taking more Our attackers are getting in behind rather than striding forward into the spaces they've made by pushing the oppo defence back


taylorstillsays

I get it for forwards but our midfielders rarely give it a crack from distance


roshampo13

Alex had a few long range bangers from free kicks IIRC


CurtainsMcGee

Jagielka v Liverpool 🥵


Wentzina_lifetime

Alex hit a ball as well as anyone I have seen. Probably could hit a volley


Daniiiiii

Reece, Alonso, Chilly probably in that order. Mase probably after that. Then literally no one. None.


Cowdude179

Chilwell is up there too


Soitsgonnabeforever

Hands down hasselbaink thunderbolt volley on a le saux flo ding dong pass is the best volley of a chelsea player. Hasselbaink could have killed a man United player of it hit someone


Rayser1

Alonso the redeemed Fullback to fullback action. What we've been missing all season after RJ got injured (and chillwell ofc)


MC_Stella

Nah that useless cunt ain’t redeemed I’m so tired of watch him jog about like a twat


mrmadoff

ah yes, redeemed. https://www.marca.com/2011/05/02/futbol/equipos/real\_madrid/1304342009.html


AndreasBerthou

Enjoy EL!


s_i_g_h_

conference league*


AndreasBerthou

Oh lol forgot that they didn't even make EL. Whoops how embarrassing


Cowdude179

James is just world class


ergotofrhyme

Wingback fc is back baby!


mohankohan

My word what a cross, and what a finish!


twomanyfaces10

That ball I'm was dirrrrty. The finish too! Wing back FC™


SirBarkington

Play him up top on Sunday


teems

Impeccable form. Strikers aren't as clinical as Alonso.


Stooperz

Marcos giveth, marcos taketh away


BrotherSeamus

He bet the over


CheekSpecific

Making up for the car crash at the other end.


DL14Nibba

🤨


KingSwagger1337

What did he take away again


Stooperz

Yur nan’s virginity


KingSwagger1337

Think it was a young life he took


Professional-Cod-927

I mean you tried and that's what matters!


KingSwagger1337

I was right tho


Professional-Cod-927

Haha I mean we're all just having fun! Don't take yourself too seriously! The other guy was just taking the piss out of you.


KingSwagger1337

Like I care lol, he supports a murderer cuz he plays on his favorite team


Stooperz

What you think of mason greenwood mate?


Professional-Cod-927

No no! So it's like British banter. So the original joke was Marcos giveth and Marcos taketh away. This is a play on a Bible verse, where the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. This is because Alonso was at fault for the first goal and then he scores one back. I guess you misunderstood and turned the joke very dark by eluding to the death of a young child which people didn't appreciate. So after that, someone decided to take the piss out of you by responding to your comment with "your nans virginity". I guess you didn't get it but it basically is an extremely humorous pun which I guess alleviated the situation and led to you getting all that downvotes. It's all jokes my guys calm down and don't take yourself too seriously!


KingSwagger1337

He still supports a murderer, which makes him braindead Also, you’re mentally ill


Stooperz

lmao he messaged me privately too


Mxurn

U13s coach robbed us of the best striker to ever grace earth just to make him a shit defender


White_Locust

James, what a cross.


solidcupoftea

I really feel this is an understatement. The way he stabs down on the ball was so fucking measured it's like ethereal or something


Ld511

That volley must be the only thing he practices in training. He is so good at it


Likeabhas

Ladies and Gentlemen, Newton's Third Law


Mattasticone

For every ‘Alonso Moment’ there is an equal and opposite ‘Alonso Moment’


whippletriple

> Newton's Third Law If Marcos Alonso has a defensive fault, he will score a banger?


almostmiddleage

Or provided an assist


TheAlmightyKrot

what a beautiful goal holy shit


IloveGuanciale

Alonso giveth, Alonso taketh


Ajaxx6

MARCOS GIVETH, MARCOS TAKETH


los_blanco_14

Has he given that person's life back yet


Stooperz

Key word… yet!


Ajaxx6

Unfortunately not.


Fawkes_91

The duality of Marcos Alonso. Deducted and then added a couple of mil to his price tag in about 35 mins of play.


ugallu

The great redemption.


Tackis

That ball from Reece SHEEEESH


PeetaGryfyndoor

fucking beautiful


Stooperz

Wingback FC back on the menu


misosoup616

complete liability on defense, deadly in attack, the marcos alonso experience


MaCheBe

Marcos “Enigma” Alonso Proper assist and finish that


whippletriple

Marcos "Mediocre at Bolton" Alonso


los_blanco_14

Marcos "lethal driver" alonso


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AuxquellesRad

Reece James is a beautiful player for real


Triangle-Yeeter

He’s not going to real. They’re all just fake news


goudendonut

Yup 13 goals and assist in lesss than 2000 minutes for a wingback is unreal


Cowdude179

So so good, played in the midfield today too


rohitbohra

James you beauty


roryking97

Textbook Alonso performance, massively at fault for conceding the goal and generally sub par all round performance but pops up with a clean strike to get a goal back lol


kisekiki

Reece James is unreal


IloveGuanciale

Reece James you beautiful man


kygrtj

Robin Van Persie if he played as wingback


jMS_44

vintage Alonso


doktorcatzen

Some coach stripped of his career as a striker.


SeriousLads

Unironically Tuchel should start him up front against Watford


efranklin13

Good goal and a great pass from Reece but it’s bittersweet thinking about the first goal


I_Jump

Wing back to wing back


mister_dupont

He's not yet in Spain!


ipgpower

Come on TT play him striker against Watford, we just need to know


beautifulbozo

This one’s for u/superworriedspursfan 🤡


superworriedspursfan

lmfao he's still not a good passer. He's only good at finishing which is not quite what you want in a wingback. Edit: I am talking about Marcus Alonzo guys not reece james


Dismal_Answer6615

Huh? Good luck finding wingbacks that are any better at passing.


superworriedspursfan

Filip Kostic is way better than Alonzo lmfao. Listen I don't want to keep hating on the man, but.... The dude is not a champions league wingback and most importantly is a horrible person. it is what it is though.


Djent_Reznor1

Marcos Alonso is literally a Champions League wingback


superworriedspursfan

Marcus Alonzo sucks lmfaoooooo. Plz keep him chelsea. I hope you do.


Djent_Reznor1

No but he literally is. Like he has literally won the CL.


superworriedspursfan

he got carried. Kante and Kai Havertz and Reece James won chelsea the CL not alonzo. He's not good. it is what it is.


Djent_Reznor1

What I’m saying is it’s a literal indisputable fact that Alonso is a Champions League wingback.


superworriedspursfan

hes not good enough to be a champions league wingback. By definition yes he is. By skill level no.


_9tail_

Ok I know this is going to seem like bait but I’m actually interested. “Horrible person”: what, exactly, do you mean by that? I’m not an idiot I know you’re referencing how he ended the life of his high school sweetheart after drunkenly speeding in wet conditions with her. My question is what, precisely, after 11 years, makes him a definitively horrible person? Is it the drunk driving? Or is it the causing death? Is it the fact that he didn’t have to face criminal charges? Does her family not wanting to press charges change anything? I don’t think you’re wrong, I’m just legitimately interested in the moral position because I find it common but rarely actually defended


superworriedspursfan

I think causing death in itself is pretty messed up. I also don't like how he acts like he doesn't do anything wrong. I don't think hes even apologized before for his incident. He also should have at least apologized to her family. Either ways, theres a lot messed up about the dude which is why I don't like him as a person.


_9tail_

Should have apologised to the family? Where are you getting this from? As for whether causing a death fundamentally makes you bad person, I’d argue that that sort of moral absolutism is somewhat lacking. Like if Kane knocked a defender the wrong way and by freak accident caused him to break his neck, would that instantly put Kane as a “horrible person”? Obviously this isn’t the same as what alonso did, I’m just trying to understand if causing a death is actually the fundamental issue


Dismal_Answer6615

I assumed you were talking about James because of the talk about passing in the context of the goal but yeah I don’t like Alonso either.


superworriedspursfan

I really rate Reece James, I think he is the best rb in the league. (trent a close second).


superworriedspursfan

thank you. this beautiful bozo guy ovverates Alonso so much lmfao. Thats why he has beef with me. I'd be really scared if Perisic was Alonzo's replacement that would be ahuge upgrade. but if fans like bozo rate alonzo than I hope chelsea do the same lmfao.


AndreasBerthou

True it was a real bad pass to Alonso for sure, anyone and their mother could do that... Lol


superworriedspursfan

Reece James is really good. Alonzo is trash. It was an amazing pass by Reece, a really average finish by alonzo though imo.


AndreasBerthou

Cheers, I misunderstood. My bad!


superworriedspursfan

plz expose this beautifulbozo guy. He actually rates Marcus Alonzo and wants to expose me for not rating him lmfao. Once again, I am really jealous that you guys have reece james. I think he is definitely up there as the best right back in the league.


Dempsonator

Feel like you’re getting downvotes because people think you’re shitting on Reece. I don’t know many Chelsea fans who think Alonso is a particularly good player nowadays. Reece on the other hand, as you’ve said in a few comments, is top quality


superworriedspursfan

apparently more chelsea fans rate Alonzo than I hoped in r/soccer. A lot of chelsea fans dislike alonzo in r/chelseafc though. I mean I guess as a spurs fan, I should be happy if you guys keep Marcus Alonzo lol, but I'm genuinely dumbfounded that so many people in this thread were downvoting me for not rating alonzo lmfao. it is what it is. Hopefully your fans are smarter than that beautifulbozo guy, but I guess if chelsea keeps alonzo, they won't be getting perisic in which would be nice as a spurs fan lol.


I_always_rated_them

Why are you spelling his name with a Z?


markash21

Not a good passer? 😂


superworriedspursfan

Reece James is a very good passer.


NotClayMerritt

Of course the bastard scores. At this point I'm convinced he'll never leave and just haunt the entire fan base until he retires.


Hannibal09

Entire fan base? Speak for yourself mate. I still think he's a decent backup for Chilly


superworriedspursfan

lmfao. Alonzo sucks. But apparently some of your fans rate alonzo lmfao. I hope you guys keep him lmfao. Great pass by Reece James though.


youngestincharge17

How many times has he fucked spurs? If he sucks then spurs must fucking slurp


superworriedspursfan

Lol. Spurs of course suck. Spurs are a banter club. But Alonzo is so bad that he wouldn't even be that much better than Reguilon or Sessegnon. What a shocking player lol.


almostmiddleage

Well at least he still provided an end product.


BoltsnRays1109

Defenders FC


KyleRaynerGotSweg

Fullback FC strikes again


Smooth-Adeptness-302

Marcos Alonso best shooting technique at Chelsea by a mile beautiful goal that


_9tail_

Reece is Le James of soccer


No-layup

Classic alonso goal


timthemartian

False 3 at it agaim


RedDragons8

RB to LB, as designed.


Cowdude179

James is world class


boky91

Hahaha that turn at 33:51, like a tractor.


Nik17

Fullback FC


WheelChair_Jimmy1

EVERYBODY GET IN HERE. WE WONT GO TO EUROPA


wooden-mEaT

Was already confirmed with the Arsenal result


WheelChair_Jimmy1

Oh shit I thought we needed at least a tie


wooden-mEaT

Tie confirms third place, so there’s still something to play for, just not as important


WheelChair_Jimmy1

Ahhhhh. There it is. 89th minute stunner from kova to seal it🤝


WhetBred14

Death, taxes, and a left footed Marcos Alonso volley


THE_DROG

He giveth, and he taketh Lives, goals, he doesn't give a fuck


mrmadoff

in what other occupation can you literally kill someone while drunk driving and be hailed as a hero by supporters of your club


Bigcity10

this morons last 10 comments have been about Marcos Alonso, meanwhile how many rapists are in the united team?


wooden-mEaT

Rich coming from rapist FC 😭 commenting the same joke 4 times doesn’t make it funnier


ChristopherDassx_16

Donno, ask your club's player mate


TheMexicanJuan

why hello there!


rishabh7102

Man already getting Alba-esque goals


almostmiddleage

If he got Alba pace, he would be the Messi of left back.


[deleted]

Thank Fuck Reece passed to alonso rather than to Lukaku.


mrmadoff

killer shot


pringle_mustache

Good lord mate give it a rest


StalkingDwarf

Fullback FC is back


Flokey44797

Alonsooooo!!! You fucking beautiful Spanish.


youngestincharge17

Man Im gonna this magician when he leaves, never gets the respect he deserves that left foot is GOLD


BigReeceJames

Wingback FC back at it


noChillGuy17

Best player in the league, i definitely wasn't slandering him 20 mins ago


Albiceleste_D10S

Classic Alonso performance. Defensively poor then pops up with a golazo


Thanh1211

+20m Barca


IncompetentAldridge

Oh thats a very lovely cross


creative_i_am_not

Our attackers should learn from our defenders


TheBlueNomad

Whoever made Alonso a defender wasted his career.


bozua

I'm a simple man. I see a Marcos Alonso goal I upvote immediately.


bozua

Gonna miss Marcos Alonso. I remember he came in with Conte and immediately started scoring goals for us. We became champions. What a unique player.


wisebluff

threat on attack, liability on defense. Position : Striker Left Back


ninjafreckles1

That was a beautiful goal. Silky smooth from kanté as well.


anthony9695

Hate him all you want but i think we will definitely miss his near post goals next season


mrmadoff

killed it!


mrmadoff

drove that right into the helpless corner


Paulbryn

Killer ball