**It seems that this post is about a translation. OP, please remember to post it so everyone can read it too!**
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccer) if you have any questions or concerns.*
God lord ,did i mention anything about hazard and the correlation to this season ,i just described how he's still loved by the players and some of the fans , that's all.
No you said nothing wrong I think their point is that we fans have no problem with hazard because our attack has been just fine without him , let take the hypothetical case we had struggled all year long not sure we would have been happy with Hazard not performing/ injuries. For the squad as you said he has a great attitudes so he mesh well with them.
>Madrid fans don't really hate him though. Good attitude overall and he's been unlucky with injuries so.
It's kind of odd how they like Hazard, but don't like Bale, despite Bale being there longer, and having accomplished more at the club, bay far.
If Bale had done as Marcelo (just continue being professional even if hes not good anymore) he would still be a legend but he has been faking injuries to be healthy for wales games and not participating in any celebration or meeting with the squad. He performed well for some years but also had bad attitude for even more years
Such a weird season. First part of the season imo Cholo was getting everything right tactically with a lot of disasterclasses from our defenders and players switching off or ball watching. Last few months have all been xi and tactical fuckups from Cholo, no idea what is going on. As soon as he started a front 2 of Suarez and Griezmann against Marcelino's Athletic the game was lost.
I remember Atlético falling off in performance at the end of last season, would you say it's a continuation of those issues or it's a different set of problems?
They were over performing by all metrics last season and obviously started to fall clip at the end of the season but since Barca were struggling and our squad was hammered by injuries no one could capitalize. Suarez also regressed he was damn clutch last season.
I thought Atletico would be fine this year after months of rest and new players but I was damn wrong. Their defense is bad and Oblak is having one of the worse season of his career individually
The weird thing is that I genuinely think we played well in many of the matches we didn't win after January last season. Against Madrid at home we were very good but missed chances and then you equalised in the 88th minute. Levante home and away we missed insane chances, I think we had 16 shots on target(not total shots) at home against them and lost 0-2😆. Betis away Correa missed 2 great chances in the end. At Camp Nou we dominated the first half and should have won
By contrary in the first half of the season we had like a 7-game winning streak despite not playing well at all. I remember being outplayed by Cadiz, Eibar, Villarreal but somehow we just kept winning and winning and winning.
We overperformed until January, but in the second half we were also really unlucky in many matches not to mention the 10-week ban for Trippier out of nowhere which fucked our game plan. But at the end we arrived roughly where we deserved to be, even though we all aged 40 years with all the drama
The team did clearly improve since then though, 6 wins in a row in La Liga and played very well vs City. We easily could have taken that tie to extra time on another day
Félix injury was a big blow considering his great form, but the whole team is playing worse. We were fucking rotten against Mallorca, Espanyol and Granada
That was my point. The results improved more than the performances and actual chance creation by the rest of the team because of Félix.
The team’s performances have been awful since Félix went out since our attack in the league to break press or try and break down low blocks is just predictable progression down the wings for there to be no striker in the area. We were playing okay but still relied mostly on Félix and vibes to score - we had and have no attacking plan against lesser La Liga sides and create barely any chances in spite of ability to control those matches.
Our best match was home against City because their superiority and possession based play allowed Cholo to set us up with his preferred low block and counter. We can’t deploy that against Granada or Mallorca.
In the preseason, I did think our squad is even stronger than both Real Madrid and Barcelona, we were actually the favour. I do agree our defenders are getting worse in each year. That's i do really think we should invest more on defenders rather than getting another big name striker again.
We have a good guess but no Atleti fan will turn on he who shall not be named. If you ask most of the "true" fans they'll say they were underdogs this season and injuries was what derailed us/the players fault mainly. It's not our fault they don't know how to play together or don't understand our tactics since they're amazing. Truth is we improved the team sure but not in the right places and then completely went 3 steps back in others which hurt us more.
They were massively overperforming previous season. Suarez and Llorente snatching points they had no business to. Injuries and squad issues/bad form mean they have regressed.
A lot of their poor form started with injuries to Savic and Giménez along with Oblak having the worst season of his career, defensive depth is a weak point that wasn’t adressed in the summer. Trippier was injured and unfit before he left for Newcastle, so they missed his creativity, and this has the knock-on effect of taking Llorente out of the midfield, arguably their best player last season. Suárez has declined further, and none of the attackers they brought in are natural strikers so his role in the team hasn’t been replaced adequately. They’ve had to restructure the attack and seemed to lose confidence, especially defensively, after a poor run of form early in the season.
>none of the attackers they brought in are natural strikers
I completely agree with your analysis apart from this. To me Cunha looks like a natural striker and Cholo seems to see him that way. He is strong, quick, loves hustling with defenders and works his ass off. Kind of a less intense Diego Costa with some more technique
He is still good but he plays way too deep to score goals.
Our midfield creates nothing so he has to drop deep. Our defense can’t defend so he even needs to drop to the back line at times, so he barely get chances anymore. Doesn’t help that we play like bullshit in final third and the chances never get to the strikers. His overall game is still great but in all honesty, I can’t blame any of our strikers this season because the problem is clearly the midfield and defense.
The squad has not fully reset mentally after the high of winning the title. That is why defending a title is so difficult(especially for a club like Atleti) to maintain that same momentum/tension level/desperation to win or whatever you want to call it. That's what separates us from Madrid or Barca
Uncharacteristic mistakes from the defence and Oblak. Despite the terrible results, statistically for much of the season we were conceding many more goals than our "xG against" would indicate. Opponents were scoring from every shot on target, and Oblak was genuinely a liability. After more than half the season, he had **more goals conceded than actual saves made**. He has since done much better and obviously he has so much trust in the bank so it's not a problem. Basically I think a lot of the defensive issues were due to anomalies and should hopefully not be repeated next season
Simeone not having any idea about his best XI and changing both players and formations every other match. I understand his panic when nothing worked but at times I think it made the situation worse and caused more uncertainty in the players. Those are the main reasons in my mind
Ancelotti: So? Raising and eyebrow
Bale: It will
Ancelotti: Why?
Bale: Have to carry my golf clubs friday when I play 36 holes in a row
Ancelotti: Makes sense
Bale: It does, doesn't it?
Ancelotti: lowers eyebrow, pops 3 new bubble gum pieces into his mouth
**SUNDAY, three days for the match**
Fabio Coentrao is in a tank top in his living room, laying on the couch, watching a repeat of 'The Simpsons' while rolling a cigarette. His phone rings. Ha places the cigarrette on his ear and pick up the phone with some reluctance.
*Coentrao*: [dry cough] Yes?
*Ancelotti*: Fabio? How are you. I am the manager. I think we need you for the next week. Marcelo is suspended.
*Coentrao*: [Covers the handset with one hand and whispers a pair of swear words in Portuguese. Breathes deeply. Checks his agenda. Gets back on the phone more calmed] When will it be? Thursday I can't. Poker game with the lads.
*Ancelotti*: No. There's no Champions on Thursday. On Wednesday. Against Atleti.
*Coentrao*: In Bilbao?
*Ancelotti*: No, Fabio. Against last year's team. The ones from Lisbon.
*Coentrao*: [Writes down the date in an empty box of pizza] OK, mister. On Wednesday, I'll be there. Call me a cab, I'm still without my driving license. Do I need to go to Valdebebas these days?
*Ancelotti*: Mmmm. It wont be necessary. As long as you're ready for Wednesday it'll be fine. I count on you, eh. By the way, Benzema is injured. Chicharito will play.
*Coentrao*: Who?
*Ancelotti*: Chicharito. The Mexican who came this summer. The one who has been training with us since October? Well, nevermind. I'll introduce you on Wednesday. Don't forget to bring a white shirt.
*Coentrao*: Ok, boss.
Coentrao hangs up and sighs. There is smoke in the room. He starts lookinf for his boots through piles of clothes, dolls made with cans of beer and Chinese food leftovers. He doesn't remember where he put them the last time. He doesn't even remember his last game. Smells the white shirt. Ugh.
**MONDAY, two days before the match**
The phone rings again. 12:36 in the morning. Fabio's hand emerge from the sheets trying to reach the nightstand. Who will call such an ungodly hour? There must be an emergency.
*Ronaldo*: Fabio, I'm Cris. How you doing monster. Did I wake you up?
*Coentrao*: [With sleepy voice but pretending to be awake] Hey, Cris. Nothing nothing. Nah, don't worry. I was doing some pushups.
*Ronaldo*: Hey, as the mister said, we need you strong for Wednesday. Like the old times.
*Coentrao*: Yes, yes. Claro. Count on it. He also told me that we play with a Colombian. Chapulín or something like that.
[Awkward silence]
*Ronaldo*: This ... yes. That's him. Get fit, man. We are all counting on you.
*Coentrao*: Tranqui, tron.
**TUESDAY, one day before the match**
Fabio goes to the park in front of his house to jog a little. He wears some New Balance sneakers he used to play tennis in 98 and a shirt with "*What happens in Cascais stays in Cascais*." written on it. After doing some stretching, runs 10 minutes and starts coughing. Well, enough for today, he thinks while he checks his heart rate. Subjecting the body to great efforts before the game could be damaging. So unprofessional.
Turns on the TV and Barça is playing against PSG. Didn't they play this year already? Thinks a confused Fabio. He laughs every time the camera focuses on David Luiz's hair.
**WEDNESDAY, gameday**
Fabio gets to the stadium by taxi. He doesn't remember very well where's the entrance to the locker room. A nice gentleman named Chendo accompanies him to his locker. He dresses. He senses the tense atmosphere in the locker room. They will play with Sergio Ramos in the midfield, which sounds strange. But Fabio never asks questions. He just follows orders. There's a guy by his side with the #14 praying on his knees. Xabi Alonso looks different. Maybe he shaved.
He steps onto the pitch and right as the Champions League anthem starts, Fabio turns. He fights every ball. He leaves it all on the pitch. Spectacular. After 87 minutes, the praying guy scores. He seems excited. Public chants a strange name. Spanish is a weird language, Fabio thinks while he crashes with Raúl García after a split ball.
Minute 90. Subbed off. The public recognizes his effort.
He showers and Ancelotti congratulates him.
*Ancelotti*: Huge game, Fabio.
*Coentrao*: Thank you, mister. It's not important. Here I am for what you need. Call me for the second leg.
Ancelotti is puzzled but prefers to say nothing. Coentrao leaves the Bernabeu without saying goodbye to anyone or talking to the press, lights a Lucky Strike and tries to stop a taxi.
Ancelotti shakes his head and smiles. Opens a pack of gum, arching an eyebrow, and starts chewing while he mumbles: "There's a method to his madness."
Even the Lord wouldn't be able to get an assist out of Mariano.
That said, Vazquez did have some amazingly crosses this season, which our forwards all promptly missed. I wonder if they are just allergic to him getting an assist.
The pressure will be on though, no excuses to not win this one.
Tbh, we **really** should have won the home derby last season. It was one of our best performances of the campaign, completely dominated for 60 minutes missing several sitters to kill the game. But we didn't kill you off and then Benzema equalised in 88th minute -.-
I remember when we fucked up a 1 on 1 chance in the 87th minute and 30 seconds later they scored, was absolutely devastating. The mental strain of last season was horrible
>The mental strain of last season was horrible
Tell me about it lol. The last two matchdays with Suarez killing our hopes late in the 2nd half both times. At least he scored earlier on the last matchday. The 88' goal on the 2nd to last matchday was brutal.
Imagine if we lost the league due to that game.. the script writers really overdid themselves last season, I've never seen anything like it. Those last matches were pure torture, I didn't enjoy the matches themselves at all just the results
I want Ceballos to start and Valverde to rest, he played a lot recently + its the only chance to let Ceballos start against a major club and see his performance.
Yes Militao could barely walk anymore but still went in to play for another few minutes to prolong the substitution of Vallejo as far as possible. I was also so scared he would have some fuck up but as every other Real Madrid player that night he was on point!
He genuinely did. If they move Carvajal onto CB they risk losing every single duel in the air. Vallejo won every header, it was a legit good call by Ancelotti.
In the first game against them this season he was playing half injured, scored against us, and then was taken off at half time lol. Your prediction is 100% coming true
Meanwhile, Gareth Bale:
"I'm sorry that my lumbago has flared up. It's very serious and even the best doctors say it could be terminal. I've spared no expense....is the camera off? Right, watch me bomb this shot 300yds with this new driver I bought. Made out of unicorn pubes, so it's extra light!"
There's an old saying in Cardiff, I know it's in Cardiff probably used in Madrid too, it goes: "Play me once, shame on you. Play me, can't get played again"
This is fucking amazing. How have I never seen this?
Edit: Apparently it's even in Fahrenheit 9/11 which I've seen more than once. I swear I'm going to have alzheimer's by the time I'm 40.
So
Rodrygo ------ Jovic/Lord Mariano ------- Asensio
(don't say Bale)
------------------- Isco/Ceballos -------------------
---------- Camavinga--------- Valverde -----------
Marcelo ------ Vallejo ------ Nacho ---- L. Vázquez
---------------------- Courtois ----------------------
I can see Atleti losing to this team, no offense.
We’re not too sure based on recent form since Félix and Lemar have been out. No one can create.
I’d like to see Griezmann play up front in support of Cunha since he’s been better than Correa and Suarez lately and may offer good incisive movement for Griezmann to play in.
When you think about how we've used Benz for the better part of the last decade it wouldn't be the craziest thing for Rodrygo to develop into a striker for us. He has a good eye for goal/positioning in the box, and he would have freedom to drift out to either side in our often very fluid front line. That isn't necessarily what I think will happen, but I wouldn't be surprised.
I don't think it's necessarily his best path, or what will happen, but I think he has the instincts to play the position. I agree he isn't strong enough (at the moment) to do all of what Benz does, and to clatter into CB's with regularity.
We will probably play the first team in the last 2 leagues games. But for this one the squad is gassed so I am happy with a heavy rotation. Hope the rotation guys show a good spirit
Another weekend of running the attack through RodryGOD on the left wing it is. Will be interested to see the rest of the setup. Guessing a midfield of Fede, Camavinga, and Ceballos, with Asensio on the right wing, Vazquez at right back. Marcelo LB? Vallejo and Nacho as the CB pair. Striker will be the most interesting one, but based on last weekend it appears Mariano is the favored choice there.
so
Courtois; Lucas, Vallejo, Nacho, Marcelo; Fede, Cama, Ceballos; Asensio, black hole, Rodrygo
midfield is fine but the defence and attack without a proper striker... fuck.
**It seems that this post is about a translation. OP, please remember to post it so everyone can read it too!** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccer) if you have any questions or concerns.*
let lunin play
Pls, I want that kid to succeed
Hazard hat trick to secure his CL final starting spot
He did resume training with the squad I believe, after his surgery was originally expected to end his season.
Wait what? already? no way!
Is he even playing football anymore
Incoming Mariano Díaz \[90\] great goal
Is Jovic still injured?
Genuinely forgot he plays for RM
Rm fans also forgot that he plays for them as well
Madrid fans don't really hate him though. Good attitude overall and he's been unlucky with injuries so.
Yeah everyone loves him ,he has a great attitude in the dressing room apparently
Lol these comments. If Madrid were having a bad season Hazard would be on blast just like Bale.
Yeah we don't really hate Hazard, but no one would say that we *like* him.
God lord ,did i mention anything about hazard and the correlation to this season ,i just described how he's still loved by the players and some of the fans , that's all.
No you said nothing wrong I think their point is that we fans have no problem with hazard because our attack has been just fine without him , let take the hypothetical case we had struggled all year long not sure we would have been happy with Hazard not performing/ injuries. For the squad as you said he has a great attitudes so he mesh well with them.
>Madrid fans don't really hate him though. Good attitude overall and he's been unlucky with injuries so. It's kind of odd how they like Hazard, but don't like Bale, despite Bale being there longer, and having accomplished more at the club, bay far.
If Bale had done as Marcelo (just continue being professional even if hes not good anymore) he would still be a legend but he has been faking injuries to be healthy for wales games and not participating in any celebration or meeting with the squad. He performed well for some years but also had bad attitude for even more years
It's not odd. You just have to understand that for Bale, it's about him. For the fans, it's about the club.
Because it was never about Performance , Mariano is trash but we don't hate him for example
Same here. Though tbh I think even he may have forgot.
Always gave us trouble at Chelsea to be fair haha
I bet you lot were delighted when he left, he seemed to always score absolute crackers against you.
Subscribe
Want Madrid to lose cause they knocked us out but if Hazard is involved I know who I'll root for.
Plus we get paid if Madrid wins
20 mil pounds well spent imo
Genuinely asking did Madrid recieve any money when Kovacic won UCL?
*the boi gets injured in the pre match warm up*
He is injured. He always oscillates between being benched and being injured. In the last 3 months he played 21 minutes for Real Madrid
Fuck that, he loved a game against us.
Yes please 😍
How did Atletico improve their squad and get worse results?
Even their fans don't know , they were the pre season favorite for the title too well I won't complain I am enjoying this
Such a weird season. First part of the season imo Cholo was getting everything right tactically with a lot of disasterclasses from our defenders and players switching off or ball watching. Last few months have all been xi and tactical fuckups from Cholo, no idea what is going on. As soon as he started a front 2 of Suarez and Griezmann against Marcelino's Athletic the game was lost.
I remember Atlético falling off in performance at the end of last season, would you say it's a continuation of those issues or it's a different set of problems?
They were over performing by all metrics last season and obviously started to fall clip at the end of the season but since Barca were struggling and our squad was hammered by injuries no one could capitalize. Suarez also regressed he was damn clutch last season. I thought Atletico would be fine this year after months of rest and new players but I was damn wrong. Their defense is bad and Oblak is having one of the worse season of his career individually
The weird thing is that I genuinely think we played well in many of the matches we didn't win after January last season. Against Madrid at home we were very good but missed chances and then you equalised in the 88th minute. Levante home and away we missed insane chances, I think we had 16 shots on target(not total shots) at home against them and lost 0-2😆. Betis away Correa missed 2 great chances in the end. At Camp Nou we dominated the first half and should have won By contrary in the first half of the season we had like a 7-game winning streak despite not playing well at all. I remember being outplayed by Cadiz, Eibar, Villarreal but somehow we just kept winning and winning and winning. We overperformed until January, but in the second half we were also really unlucky in many matches not to mention the 10-week ban for Trippier out of nowhere which fucked our game plan. But at the end we arrived roughly where we deserved to be, even though we all aged 40 years with all the drama
“The team has learned its lesson after the Levante loss.” Oh wait, nevermind, it was just Félix balling and carrying the team.
The team did clearly improve since then though, 6 wins in a row in La Liga and played very well vs City. We easily could have taken that tie to extra time on another day Félix injury was a big blow considering his great form, but the whole team is playing worse. We were fucking rotten against Mallorca, Espanyol and Granada
That was my point. The results improved more than the performances and actual chance creation by the rest of the team because of Félix. The team’s performances have been awful since Félix went out since our attack in the league to break press or try and break down low blocks is just predictable progression down the wings for there to be no striker in the area. We were playing okay but still relied mostly on Félix and vibes to score - we had and have no attacking plan against lesser La Liga sides and create barely any chances in spite of ability to control those matches. Our best match was home against City because their superiority and possession based play allowed Cholo to set us up with his preferred low block and counter. We can’t deploy that against Granada or Mallorca.
In the preseason, I did think our squad is even stronger than both Real Madrid and Barcelona, we were actually the favour. I do agree our defenders are getting worse in each year. That's i do really think we should invest more on defenders rather than getting another big name striker again.
Biggest problem is that Giménez is made of paper maché so you can't rely on him at all. This makes our backups like Felipe play a ton of minutes
And Gimenez has not been consistent since Godin left. We definitely need some impact and names like how we bought Godin.
He started suarez? The man has no knees lol.
They weren't. Real were the favourites according to the bookies.
We have a good guess but no Atleti fan will turn on he who shall not be named. If you ask most of the "true" fans they'll say they were underdogs this season and injuries was what derailed us/the players fault mainly. It's not our fault they don't know how to play together or don't understand our tactics since they're amazing. Truth is we improved the team sure but not in the right places and then completely went 3 steps back in others which hurt us more.
Cholo nearly lost the dressing room halfway through the season.
Lmao if Simeone is losing the dressing room then that dressing room needs some changes.
They were massively overperforming previous season. Suarez and Llorente snatching points they had no business to. Injuries and squad issues/bad form mean they have regressed.
A lot of their poor form started with injuries to Savic and Giménez along with Oblak having the worst season of his career, defensive depth is a weak point that wasn’t adressed in the summer. Trippier was injured and unfit before he left for Newcastle, so they missed his creativity, and this has the knock-on effect of taking Llorente out of the midfield, arguably their best player last season. Suárez has declined further, and none of the attackers they brought in are natural strikers so his role in the team hasn’t been replaced adequately. They’ve had to restructure the attack and seemed to lose confidence, especially defensively, after a poor run of form early in the season.
>none of the attackers they brought in are natural strikers I completely agree with your analysis apart from this. To me Cunha looks like a natural striker and Cholo seems to see him that way. He is strong, quick, loves hustling with defenders and works his ass off. Kind of a less intense Diego Costa with some more technique
Is Griezmann still good or is he just playing out of position? 3 goals in 22 games...I did not expect that.
He was good in the CL but in the league has been poor
He is still good but he plays way too deep to score goals. Our midfield creates nothing so he has to drop deep. Our defense can’t defend so he even needs to drop to the back line at times, so he barely get chances anymore. Doesn’t help that we play like bullshit in final third and the chances never get to the strikers. His overall game is still great but in all honesty, I can’t blame any of our strikers this season because the problem is clearly the midfield and defense.
The squad has not fully reset mentally after the high of winning the title. That is why defending a title is so difficult(especially for a club like Atleti) to maintain that same momentum/tension level/desperation to win or whatever you want to call it. That's what separates us from Madrid or Barca Uncharacteristic mistakes from the defence and Oblak. Despite the terrible results, statistically for much of the season we were conceding many more goals than our "xG against" would indicate. Opponents were scoring from every shot on target, and Oblak was genuinely a liability. After more than half the season, he had **more goals conceded than actual saves made**. He has since done much better and obviously he has so much trust in the bank so it's not a problem. Basically I think a lot of the defensive issues were due to anomalies and should hopefully not be repeated next season Simeone not having any idea about his best XI and changing both players and formations every other match. I understand his panic when nothing worked but at times I think it made the situation worse and caused more uncertainty in the players. Those are the main reasons in my mind
Thanks for the detailed exposition.
Well explained, 190 cm guy.
Same thing happened with united this season. Got to say it feels great from a supporters pov
Idk I can remember when before the season I was fully expecting them to win the title again
They talked so much shit to Barca fans especially about the GrieZman stuff and are about to finish behind them lol
I fully expect Modric to start, just like against Espanyol..
Death, taxes, Don Carlo starts with Godric.
godric will graft new legs
[Si mister](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FFyVKbIXMAEbpoT?format=jpg&name=large)
Doubt it. Atletico are dogs and we aren't going to risk any injury.
Unleash the Welsh man.
>**Ancelotti**: Bale, counting on you for the derbi. >**Bale**: I don't think so. Back pain. >**Ancelotti**: Your back hurts? >**Bale**: No.
>**Joey**: Hey, Phoebs, do you wanna help? > >**Phoebe**: Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.
Brits: Such a disrespectful moment from Ancelotti. Poor Bale.
The worst thing about this comment is that it's not even satire
In the final if Bale doesn't start over Benzema we riot.
I mean why would you start Benzema, is he even as good as Harry Kane? /s
Gareth “Ben Simmons” Bale
He's ramping up!
Ancelotti: So? Raising and eyebrow Bale: It will Ancelotti: Why? Bale: Have to carry my golf clubs friday when I play 36 holes in a row Ancelotti: Makes sense Bale: It does, doesn't it? Ancelotti: lowers eyebrow, pops 3 new bubble gum pieces into his mouth
Somebody call up Coentrão
**SUNDAY, three days for the match** Fabio Coentrao is in a tank top in his living room, laying on the couch, watching a repeat of 'The Simpsons' while rolling a cigarette. His phone rings. Ha places the cigarrette on his ear and pick up the phone with some reluctance. *Coentrao*: [dry cough] Yes? *Ancelotti*: Fabio? How are you. I am the manager. I think we need you for the next week. Marcelo is suspended. *Coentrao*: [Covers the handset with one hand and whispers a pair of swear words in Portuguese. Breathes deeply. Checks his agenda. Gets back on the phone more calmed] When will it be? Thursday I can't. Poker game with the lads. *Ancelotti*: No. There's no Champions on Thursday. On Wednesday. Against Atleti. *Coentrao*: In Bilbao? *Ancelotti*: No, Fabio. Against last year's team. The ones from Lisbon. *Coentrao*: [Writes down the date in an empty box of pizza] OK, mister. On Wednesday, I'll be there. Call me a cab, I'm still without my driving license. Do I need to go to Valdebebas these days? *Ancelotti*: Mmmm. It wont be necessary. As long as you're ready for Wednesday it'll be fine. I count on you, eh. By the way, Benzema is injured. Chicharito will play. *Coentrao*: Who? *Ancelotti*: Chicharito. The Mexican who came this summer. The one who has been training with us since October? Well, nevermind. I'll introduce you on Wednesday. Don't forget to bring a white shirt. *Coentrao*: Ok, boss. Coentrao hangs up and sighs. There is smoke in the room. He starts lookinf for his boots through piles of clothes, dolls made with cans of beer and Chinese food leftovers. He doesn't remember where he put them the last time. He doesn't even remember his last game. Smells the white shirt. Ugh. **MONDAY, two days before the match** The phone rings again. 12:36 in the morning. Fabio's hand emerge from the sheets trying to reach the nightstand. Who will call such an ungodly hour? There must be an emergency. *Ronaldo*: Fabio, I'm Cris. How you doing monster. Did I wake you up? *Coentrao*: [With sleepy voice but pretending to be awake] Hey, Cris. Nothing nothing. Nah, don't worry. I was doing some pushups. *Ronaldo*: Hey, as the mister said, we need you strong for Wednesday. Like the old times. *Coentrao*: Yes, yes. Claro. Count on it. He also told me that we play with a Colombian. Chapulín or something like that. [Awkward silence] *Ronaldo*: This ... yes. That's him. Get fit, man. We are all counting on you. *Coentrao*: Tranqui, tron. **TUESDAY, one day before the match** Fabio goes to the park in front of his house to jog a little. He wears some New Balance sneakers he used to play tennis in 98 and a shirt with "*What happens in Cascais stays in Cascais*." written on it. After doing some stretching, runs 10 minutes and starts coughing. Well, enough for today, he thinks while he checks his heart rate. Subjecting the body to great efforts before the game could be damaging. So unprofessional. Turns on the TV and Barça is playing against PSG. Didn't they play this year already? Thinks a confused Fabio. He laughs every time the camera focuses on David Luiz's hair. **WEDNESDAY, gameday** Fabio gets to the stadium by taxi. He doesn't remember very well where's the entrance to the locker room. A nice gentleman named Chendo accompanies him to his locker. He dresses. He senses the tense atmosphere in the locker room. They will play with Sergio Ramos in the midfield, which sounds strange. But Fabio never asks questions. He just follows orders. There's a guy by his side with the #14 praying on his knees. Xabi Alonso looks different. Maybe he shaved. He steps onto the pitch and right as the Champions League anthem starts, Fabio turns. He fights every ball. He leaves it all on the pitch. Spectacular. After 87 minutes, the praying guy scores. He seems excited. Public chants a strange name. Spanish is a weird language, Fabio thinks while he crashes with Raúl García after a split ball. Minute 90. Subbed off. The public recognizes his effort. He showers and Ancelotti congratulates him. *Ancelotti*: Huge game, Fabio. *Coentrao*: Thank you, mister. It's not important. Here I am for what you need. Call me for the second leg. Ancelotti is puzzled but prefers to say nothing. Coentrao leaves the Bernabeu without saying goodbye to anyone or talking to the press, lights a Lucky Strike and tries to stop a taxi. Ancelotti shakes his head and smiles. Opens a pack of gum, arching an eyebrow, and starts chewing while he mumbles: "There's a method to his madness."
what is this absolute beauty
A very famous pasta from yesteryear E: Someone has sourced it down below.
> Don't forget to bring a white shirt. Always ends me, out of all the moments of this pasta, this is the most "sunday league" of them all.
Man this is so fucking amazing I want more
I want the second episode brah
Amazing. Simply amazing. Source: https://www.reddit.com/r/realmadrid/comments/33p32w/72_hours_with_coentrao_before_real_madrid/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
What did I just read?
It's been a while since I've seen this, thank you for bringing it back
What is this?
I will never get tired of this pasta.
And Drenthe
Is he still a Madrid player?
No he is a fisherman now
He was never leashed to begin with
Lucas crosses to… M a r i a n o
Even the Lord wouldn't be able to get an assist out of Mariano. That said, Vazquez did have some amazingly crosses this season, which our forwards all promptly missed. I wonder if they are just allergic to him getting an assist.
If Vazquez was crossing instead of Carvajal that day…
shhhhhhh. No if!
Atleti might have a chance finally
The pressure will be on though, no excuses to not win this one. Tbh, we **really** should have won the home derby last season. It was one of our best performances of the campaign, completely dominated for 60 minutes missing several sitters to kill the game. But we didn't kill you off and then Benzema equalised in 88th minute -.-
I remember when we fucked up a 1 on 1 chance in the 87th minute and 30 seconds later they scored, was absolutely devastating. The mental strain of last season was horrible
>The mental strain of last season was horrible Tell me about it lol. The last two matchdays with Suarez killing our hopes late in the 2nd half both times. At least he scored earlier on the last matchday. The 88' goal on the 2nd to last matchday was brutal.
Imagine if we lost the league due to that game.. the script writers really overdid themselves last season, I've never seen anything like it. Those last matches were pure torture, I didn't enjoy the matches themselves at all just the results
> Dude, I'm half Swedish half Spanish, 1.90 cm tall with blue eyes. Getting girls is pretty easy thankfully.
What a fucking tool
Lmao which dumbass said this
😘
Somehow, Atleti will still struggle. Nothing is ever easy with this club
I wanna see Arribas start. Please Carlo make it happen
or miguel torres....or rafa marin or peter or antonio blanco or gila...
I want Ceballos to start and Valverde to rest, he played a lot recently + its the only chance to let Ceballos start against a major club and see his performance.
Valverde played full time vs City, of all people he should definitely be rested the most
Lord Vallejo masterclass incoming.
He was actually pretty good against City those last 5 minutes and Espanyol as well
Lol I was half expecting a calamity from him but he won every single duel
You and everybody at the Bernebeu. The anxiety when he was around the ball was evident. Huge cheers for every clearance.
Yes Militao could barely walk anymore but still went in to play for another few minutes to prolong the substitution of Vallejo as far as possible. I was also so scared he would have some fuck up but as every other Real Madrid player that night he was on point!
He genuinely did. If they move Carvajal onto CB they risk losing every single duel in the air. Vallejo won every header, it was a legit good call by Ancelotti.
He can be good sometimes, wonder how good he'd be without the injuries.
He needs confidence and to overcome injuries. He is fast, good in the air, reads the game well. Though not as good on the ball.
He had lot of potential and looked to be a real deal when he was in Castilla. Edit : Brainfart friday moment. It was Zaragoza where he looked good.
He never played in Castilla though
he looked amazing at Frankfurt before he came back
Espanyol didn't do the things that have given him the most trouble in the past, but I agree that he played very well in that match.
He was so good for Frankfurt. Can't forget that nutmeg pass on Robben when he was in his own half
When he came on against City I was 100% expecting a massive game changing fuckup from him, but credit to him as he actually did really well.
You, me, the blind 99.99% of the people watching the game had the same thought. He proved us wrong and i’m happy for it
He’s been good man. Pleasantly surprised. Maybe there is still something there to evolve. Man looked like Puyol regen when we bought him!
[удалено]
While laughing hysterically with Casemiro
In the first game against them this season he was playing half injured, scored against us, and then was taken off at half time lol. Your prediction is 100% coming true
Real Madrid’s “B” squad is Rodrygo, Valverde, Camavinga, and Ceballos. They are actually outperforming the “main” team at the moment. 🤣
Watch us still struggling against this team
I'll see you in the matchthread so we can watch together!
Cholo going to to pull out the old 5-5
Meanwhile, Gareth Bale: "I'm sorry that my lumbago has flared up. It's very serious and even the best doctors say it could be terminal. I've spared no expense....is the camera off? Right, watch me bomb this shot 300yds with this new driver I bought. Made out of unicorn pubes, so it's extra light!"
“Now watch this drive”
There's an old saying in Cardiff, I know it's in Cardiff probably used in Madrid too, it goes: "Play me once, shame on you. Play me, can't get played again"
What movie was that in again lol
sadly it’s rooted in reality lol https://youtu.be/TCm9788Tb5g
"Mission Accomplished" Lmao.
I can't believe that's real. It seriously looks like a perfect satire skit.
Lmao
This is fucking amazing. How have I never seen this? Edit: Apparently it's even in Fahrenheit 9/11 which I've seen more than once. I swear I'm going to have alzheimer's by the time I'm 40.
Alexa play Hen Wlad Fy Nhadau
Then book me 18 please and thanks
So Rodrygo ------ Jovic/Lord Mariano ------- Asensio (don't say Bale) ------------------- Isco/Ceballos ------------------- ---------- Camavinga--------- Valverde ----------- Marcelo ------ Vallejo ------ Nacho ---- L. Vázquez ---------------------- Courtois ---------------------- I can see Atleti losing to this team, no offense.
I would rest Valverde for Ceballos. Would love to see Isco start.
ceballos probably deserves another start. Double pivot of him and cama could be tastey
Backline of dreams
Either a masterclass from them or just big approximative football vibes
Valerde shouldn't play he played 120 minutes vs City
I'd rest Nacho as well, play Mario Gila or someone
Just put Gila and Rafa in, fuck it put de La Vibora in the squad.
Yeah, that is still a good squad. I think Atletico will have some troubles with that midfield especially
Play Bale you cowards.
Lol we wish, he refuses to do so.
I would like to see him as well, but he is injured just like Hazard
I'm not sure we could beat Madrid Castilla on our current form, but I'll take any help we can get.
Bale regaining match fitness ahead of another Liverpool final
Alison: *chuckles in danger*
Hen Wlad Fy Nhadau intensifies
Klopp might put Karius in for full revenge mode
All i want is a Hazard masterclass
No Benzema, no party. Atlético to win and keep top 4. Bétis fucked up.
Partey left us a while back now.
We’re not too sure based on recent form since Félix and Lemar have been out. No one can create. I’d like to see Griezmann play up front in support of Cunha since he’s been better than Correa and Suarez lately and may offer good incisive movement for Griezmann to play in.
Rodrygod back at it then. However, its the league so i dont expect much. If it were another CL match, i would expect nothing less than a hattrick
Rodrygo on the left has been by far our best player on the pitch in last 2 La Liga games (Espanyol and Osasuna)
He played good when he started the last match on left side. He has such a good eye for goal should just try him as number 9 or second striker
When you think about how we've used Benz for the better part of the last decade it wouldn't be the craziest thing for Rodrygo to develop into a striker for us. He has a good eye for goal/positioning in the box, and he would have freedom to drift out to either side in our often very fluid front line. That isn't necessarily what I think will happen, but I wouldn't be surprised.
Rodrygo needs to seriously bulk up for that to happen
I don't think it's necessarily his best path, or what will happen, but I think he has the instincts to play the position. I agree he isn't strong enough (at the moment) to do all of what Benz does, and to clatter into CB's with regularity.
He is very versatile. And his link up play is amazing. Can really fill in Benzema's position when he is not available.
Saving their legs for Liverpool, what a luxury. Hazard will terrorise Liverpool again and do a bicycle kick like Bale did
We will probably play the first team in the last 2 leagues games. But for this one the squad is gassed so I am happy with a heavy rotation. Hope the rotation guys show a good spirit
>We will probably play the first team in the last 2 leagues games Is there any reason to? Apart from match fitness?
Fitness is the sole reason
I think it's just to keep form. It'd probably not be a good idea to face Liverpool after a one month vacation.
Part of why the Liverpool Tottenham final was so boring is because it was two weeks after the season, players lose the sharpness so quick
>and do a bicycle kick like Bale did Nah, he'll do it himself.
Madrid have a month to basically fuck off until the final.
Don Carlo rotating the team 🤨
Another weekend of running the attack through RodryGOD on the left wing it is. Will be interested to see the rest of the setup. Guessing a midfield of Fede, Camavinga, and Ceballos, with Asensio on the right wing, Vazquez at right back. Marcelo LB? Vallejo and Nacho as the CB pair. Striker will be the most interesting one, but based on last weekend it appears Mariano is the favored choice there.
Good news.
Can we just field Castilla?
Is about time to see at last Bale
shocked_pikachu.jpg
What is it with mariano and calling him lord mariano I can't cope with the memes lmao
Well Alaba is injured and it was obvious they wouldn't throw him in now already again in a game that doesn't have importance
Damn what a fucking username. Respect.
Atletico will sit back anyway
so Courtois; Lucas, Vallejo, Nacho, Marcelo; Fede, Cama, Ceballos; Asensio, black hole, Rodrygo midfield is fine but the defence and attack without a proper striker... fuck.
Valerde shouldn't play he played 120 minutes vs City
Man i was checking the wages the other day and the top 2 paid players barely played for Real this season.bale and hazard. Damn that sucks