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Saitama1993

Totally agree sir. She also has the right to have sexual intercourse with other 3-4 fine lads in the meantime, while you wait to take her to the altar. You know why? Because she is worth it ! Doesn't matter if her lady bits are beings smashed by some mongrels, in the end you win cause you put a ring on her, provided for her and were such a nice guy. She will be forever grateful, even after divorce, which is your fault by the way. Thank you for opening our eyes sir u/ogsimpology


ogsimpology

You can make a joke out of it, but if you don't want a hoe, don't expect sex on the first date :)


Saitama1993

There are no hoes, only queenz. Stop with the misogyny.


[deleted]

🔥


Reverse2First

“2-3 months to wait for sex” this mofo has to be trolling !


ogsimpology

Well yea. We did oral and stuff, bur maybe a month after we got into a relationship. Commitment before sex


AbbreviationsHot1200

The problem with a man waiting to have sex with a woman is if she isn't


FizzleMateriel

Ding ding ding.


chilikettlechips

And on top of this then it's, "okay, how long then?" And there's never a straight answer. How many days weeks or months does this lucky fellah get to wait meanwhile he's expected to pay for everything on top of it? And then how do you know the sex is even worth it? Is it going to be good? Is there sexual compatibility? Is the juice worth the squeeze? What if she's actually just aesexual? Best not to wait 3 months and get emotionally invested to find that out. Let the aesexuals/low libidos just date each other.


louiiman

Don’t pay for anything in the interim or keep things cheap.


Alt_Er_Midlertidig

I don't have casual sex ever. I didn't even have sex with my first BF who I was with for a whole year dating exclusively. (we only kissed or groped each other) My SO and I were together exclusively for almost 6 months before any type of touching beneath the belt. In the mean time, he paid for almost all of our dates. I had keys to his home and he has keys to mine. I invited him to meet my friends, my co-workers and family and he did the same. We are focused on having a relationship that lasts and for me, it means being with a man who can be without sex a few months at a time. I am anti-sex work, I do not accept pornography, I am a proud "prude". My SO is 193cm because I will not date short men.


AbbreviationsHot1200

Chris rock talked about it once, compared waiting for sex to going without food, and finally you get a cracker and think its the best food you've ever had, but only because you were starving


chilikettlechips

There's a big difference in breaking your fast compared to eating that same meal forever for the rest of your life until death do you part.


AbbreviationsHot1200

I dont think you understood. Chris rock is saying the only reason the sex seems so good is because you had to wait so long for it. If you were well fed you wouldn't even want crackers


Mimoxs

Ya but the paranoia you guys have over that is dumb. The majority of women who are waiting to fuck you are not secretly fucking 15 taller bigger dicked dudes behind your back the whole time. They're waiting bc they're high inhibition/reserved sexual orientations. Like I'm sure it's happened before but the idea that it's commonplace or if you assume that's what's happening every time a girl wants to wait, is the prime example of male hysteria. It's like women who assume/act like every new date is going to be Ted Bundy Jr


Stahlboden

>Ted Bundy Of all the maniacs you chose someone who is famous for recieving love letters from women who know what he has done.


Jakes1967

>Ya but the paranoia you guys have over that is dumb. The majority of women who are waiting to fuck you are not secretly fucking 15 taller bigger dicked dudes behind your back the whole time. Fair, but if she's had casual relationships before, where she didn't wait to have sex, then she's selling to you, what was a "free gift" to them and any man who buys it, is a fool.


RPslimjim

You’re basically paying full price for a used Bentley, when guys like me rented it for free.


Jakes1967

>You’re basically paying full price for a used Bentley, when guys like me rented it for free. As Leykis said; "Why buy when you can rent and why rent when you can lease?"


[deleted]

As the old line feminists used to say "have to treat all MnMs as poisoned". In a time like this, there is no way to reliably know if a girl made every guy wait, so it has to be assumed that there is at least one guy a given girl didn't make wait, and decide whatever you're going to decide accordingly.


Chaddamhusein

Try dating women and youll see how bullshit this high Inhibition argument is


AbbreviationsHot1200

I'd bet it's 50/50 Women justify it by saying they arnt serious about the guy they're fucking but they are serious about the guy who has to wait


Nyanu

lol yeah fuck that noise. I don't mind waiting but I'd never be apart of that shit.


lestratege

Yeah. Women seem to miss the point. It's not whether you wait or not for sex that matters, either is fine for men. It's applying different standards with different men that matters.


brimonge

this yes!


SteveSan82

They are sleeping with other men. I’m the other guy


[deleted]

I figure that *most* women aren't fucking around on the side while you court them, but I figure it happens often enough that you should keep an eye out for it. IMO it's one of those things that's technically *fine* if someone wants to do, but it's a red flag for future relationship prospects.


Dis_mah_mobile_one

Most people never encounter a serial killer, but most people *do* have a limited experiential window for pair bonding, and women’s is even more limited than men’s so it’s far from hysteria.


throwawayacc1347

>" this is so stupid. one is logical, because promiscuous women exist. the other one is so retardedly unlikely. if you want to say its hyperbole sure, but its easy as fuck to avoid generally violent guys as well. except they dont either


Desmo4488

This is only true if the person making the person wait has a history (their past behaviors) that aligns with this ideal, otherwise this is pure hypocrisy. It's a red flag. Either that person doesn't actually know how to say they have a low libido or are romantically/sexually inexperienced. Otherwise they are keeping their options open, weaponizing sexuality. Have you seen how FDS operates? It's not hysteria. Many women who know they can easily get sex simply for being female are trying to get some sucker who can look past their high body count and settle. Edit: grammar


AtomicMGTOW

You know you really shouldn't start making an argument by saying you're stupid and paranoid. That's gaslighting and shaming. You could have totally skipped that and started with the second sentence and been perfectly fine. I'm making this point because you go on the attack when you feel defensive. And then that tells me that somebody hit really close to home. And then you use a massive exaggeration to try and shame and gaslight even further. No she may not be f****** 15 other dudes and she might not even be f****** one but men must assume she's looking at a couple dudes and she's not going to be honest about it. And then of course you'll say that she doesn't have to because she's not exclusively committed to you blah blah blah. Women very rarely date with intention. They only start dating with intention when the wall approcches and her natural biological and reproductive instincts start to kick in. Now she's done with the f*** boys and she's going to make the new potential beta wait when she's giving it away 15 times before for absolutely zero investment or even less, meaning she was chasing him and throwing herself at him. So when a woman starts making rules for me that she broke for other men those aren't really rules. And don't give me no s*** about being dumb and stupid especially past 24. When they say that a woman is playing hard to get that's exactly what they mean she's playing. She's just batting the bunny around. She's kind of bored so she's just playing a different game than before. Back to what the op was saying. He's right.. decent guys will be patient. or at least we used to be when we didn't know any better about red pill and female nature. I saw someone make the argument that you know she's scared that maybe she'll give it up and then he'll take off. I told this to my wife and I'll tell this to any woman that's listening... You have two choices: f*** him and he might leave or don't f*** him and he will. And if a guy is waiting more than 2-3 (max) months and you're still playing you're not going to have any respect for him. And getting a guy to wait that long is really only possible with a near-virginal high school girl. The audacity of a slut claiming to be reformed and then making him pay the f****** price for her used p**** because now she's got PTSD is ridiculous. I can't even believe that women think on any level that the argument about men doing it too is of any value. A woman is letting multiple people inside her body at great risk while treating it like it's a f****** toy. Sex is a much riskier business for women than it is for men the idea that it's the f****** same is so f****** retarded. The only reason why I even took the time out to write this was because of your last paragraph about women thinking every man is a predator. You can thank your mother's for that. But it's so interesting how many women spend bodies on actual predatory bad boy narcissistic no potential losers drug addicts and Petty thugs and criminals. And it's not once or twice it's over and over cuz it's exciting and you want to see if you can bring this man to his knees by using your p****. You're doing the exact same thing to the beta that you now want to provide for you and be a good guy. At the end of the day you're using your vagina for currency and that is prostitution-lite. And we wouldn't even care if you were just honest about it. Instead of screaming about being strong and independent say look I'm young and hot and I've got this f****** p**** so I'm going to capitalize on it and get the best man that I can possibly get because it's a hell of a lot easier to f****** suck than it is to go I don't know get some f****** degree and try and climb the corporate ladder well forsaking children or trying to manage both of those at the same time, without a man. You know maybe the fair rule would be that if she's going to make him wait x amount of time before sex then he gets to wait that same amount of time without divulging anything about what he does or where he's from or what kind of money he makes or what kind of status he has. If it's just supposed to be about love then it doesn't matter does it. You want him to stay and love you for you not your p**** and he wants you to love him and stay for him. There. Even, or close enough. But no... You want to know everything to find out what you're going to get for your banged up PTSD p****. Jesus.


ConsultJimMoriarty

You know you're allowed to swear on the internet, right? No one is gonna give you detention for it.


Mimoxs

Dude what


cccccclairee

This is a Reddit philosophy that I have never once heard of in real life. It is so wild to be so fixated on it.


AbbreviationsHot1200

You've never been having sex with a chick who was making another wait?


BacanaHeaven

…ok, and? This post obviously refers to a woman who has set her boundaries early. A woman committing to sex very early in a relationship is also a red flag.


tryingmybestatm

guys dont want to wait these days becoz they find out 2 of these things: a) the woman was fucking an fwb or someone else while he was waiting b) the woman slept with other guys on the first date while u had to wait( he usually finds this out later) the problem is inconsistent women, we dont want to find out how you slept with a friend of a friend on the 2nd 3rd date while i had to wait for months or you were seeing ur fwb while we were dating without getting sexual. if u make every guy wait the same time, as in you vet every guy regardless of looks/ status/ money/ drunkenness the same way then we are absolutely ok with waiting.


ogsimpology

a) Having a FWB relationship with someone just means you wanted sex at that period of your life, and no serious commitment. It shouldn't reflect what you want maybe months or years down the line b) If she slept with others on the first date, but didn't commit or have a good relationship with them anyway, then why should that matter? They had a strong sexual connection that faded. If she sleeps with everyone on the first date but you, then that's a red flag. But if she just wanted to wait this time, what's the issue?


tryingmybestatm

if u didnt make another guy wait that means sex to you is something casual and that's ok. but if u start acting like a virgin who's not interested in having sex until months in then that's the problem, can't you be consistent? also importantly u said it urself, she slept with some other guy on the first date becoz of a strong sexual connection so if ur not feeling the same with me then stay away.


Jakes1967

>a) Having a FWB relationship with someone just means you wanted sex at that period of your life, and no serious commitment. It shouldn't reflect what you want maybe months or years down the line Why not? >b) If she slept with others on the first date, but didn't commit or have a good relationship with them anyway, then why should that matter? They had a strong sexual connection that faded. And what happens after the months of investment and there's no sexual connection? >If she sleeps with everyone on the first date but you, then that's a red flag. But if she just wanted to wait this time, what's the issue? The issue is differential treatment, means unequal investment.


Mavec2

u/uogsimpology You're a woman, right?


ogsimpology

Man


Mavec2

But you’re not straight, right?


ogsimpology

I'm married to a woman forehead


Mavec2

But she wears the pants, right?


SladeWilsonXL9

Ogsimpology, this is definitely a troll account. 🤣🤣


Lameador

Best answer of the thread. You nailed it.


ghostinthepost

I'm always confused what people mean when they say make a man wait for sex. Like what level of intimacy is allowed during the waiting period? I don't think I'd have an issue waiting 2-3 months for sex if we're making out, cuddling, sleeping in the same bed, maybe some hand or oral stuff. But if we're keeping 6 feet apart for 2-3 months than I don't see why any guy would stick around for that long because it would seem like the person you're with doesn't like you very much.


ogsimpology

Yea I mean we can do something, but if she's clearly distant and doesn't want ANYTHING, she's not interested. But if she wants to and is doing other stuff with you, other than PIV, then just wait


NoMarriageNoKids

It's a game. Women give it up on dates 1-3 to guys they're really into. Then, when it's time to "settle down with a nice guy" they play chaste and use a different rule book.


ConsultJimMoriarty

For some people, sex is really big deal, esp with a new partner. It's a big jump for that person. If you don't respect that, or don't understand it, then you're not compatible and shouldn't be dating.


LondonLobby

Ok if that’s true then what is the problem? Men who leave women who make them wait should be a non issue. Notice how you’re highlighting what the women wants and saying to be considerate but you did not mention any consideration for what the man wants? Where is the equality? Men should protect their own interests just as you are saying women should protect theirs. There’s is absolutely nothing wrong with men who protect their time by not playing the waiting game with women who aren’t virgins.


ConsultJimMoriarty

I think you're highlighting what *you* think about women, because I didn't mention women or men at all. I said "people" and "person". And as I said, if you don't respect that someone wants to wait - and some men want to wait, too! - *you shouldn't be dating that person*.


LondonLobby

You are missing the big picture. For example, If a man leaves a women who is trying to make them wait months to have sex like OP mentioned, then that’s not being disrespectful. That is RESPECT. You are respecting their time by leaving them so they can continue their search for some sucker.. erm.. *cough*.. some person who will wait. You’re saying to respect someone who wants to wait, but where is the respect for someone who doesn’t want to wait? Where is the equality? You would have to explain to me how it is not being respectful for a man to leave because he doesn’t want to wait. And pleas be considerate towards both parties wants.


daddysgotanew

This. High value men don’t wait. Because they don’t have to. Women give it up easy for them and if he comes across one that doesn’t? Well there’s 10 more in line so he goes off to get one of them


Barneysparky

Every date I've been on in my life-time followed the same pattern. If we were really into each other the guy went in for a kiss, then we set up a next date. If the date wasn't working inevitably the guy wanted to have sex that night. HVM want to wait when they feel a connection, it's easy to just pump and dump someone you know is not potentially a match. You consider HVM as men who are just in for sex and get sex. Women consider this guy a fuck boi.


LondonLobby

Considering that “fuck bois” are fucking most of the women and “nice guys” are down bad right now, it’s should be clear why men who know their worth aren’t playing the waiting game.


Dis_mah_mobile_one

It’s also easier to wait for a connection when a man has options and isn’t obligated to celibacy while he waits on an individual woman.


xcheshirecatxx

And many people, including women like me, feel there's no connection to have with someone who wait to have sex


HumanNumber348

The reverse is also the case. I would never want to be with a person who’s unable to go without sex for a couple weeks.


worldnewsie

When was this, back in the 70s and 80s?


Barneysparky

I dated the most around 2000. I thought you were all about evolutionary bio truths?


worldnewsie

Me personally? I don't think you and I have ever spoken. But no.


purplish_possum

>It's a game. Women give it up on dates 1-3 to guys they're really into. Exactly, if she doesn't its time to bounce.


StacksFifthAve

Yep. If it takes a woman more than 3-5 weeks from the date of your first date to fuck you, she is simply not into you.


TrueStorms

I really wish people would be more clear on this too. There’s a huge gap between a woman who’s a little neurotic about pregnancy and STDs (many women) so sticks to making out and oral for a little bit and a woman who won’t even kiss until marriage. It’s hard to to discuss the topic when people don’t define it.


lestratege

>maybe some hand or oral stuff. Most of the world really have a hard time understanding Americans about what they consider having sex mean. "I did not have sex with that woman" wasn't just Clinton weaseling out... The puritanical thinking sometimes join the islamist thinking of girls wanting only anal to still be virgin for their future husband... Like what?? These legalities shenanigans are just really WTF for lots of people.


buffin-big-bowls

You bring up a good point


Liberal_On_Guns

Okay Derrick Jaxn. Plenty of guys don't have a problem "waiting" a reasonable amount of time, Just not going to wait for a girl they think is a hoe, or think she was a hoe. And they aren't going to wait if they think it's a power play (FDS shit). Consider the space. A ton of these guys do not have any interest in marriage, so that's going to skew the perspective. If you aren't interested in marriage, by what logic would you expect to wait for sex? Some guys are going to be religious, and some not. There is no reason for a secular man to wait for sex if he has options. Generally speaking, the way I hear them speak irl, women think **their** pussy is the holy grail of sexual achievement, no matter how basic the sex is. So the question ladies honestly have to ask is "am I worth the wait?" For a simp, the answer will always be yes.


dbz19

Yeah, exactly. I’ll wait for a woman who believes waiting is part of her values and attitude towards the role of sex in a relationship. I wouldn’t wait for a woman who only makes YOU wait but eagerly had sex with her past boyfriends. FDS is like “virginity is a social construct used to oppress women, men have no right to know. Also make him wait to have sex until after he marries you.”


Liberal_On_Guns

>I wouldn’t wait for a woman who only makes YOU wait but eagerly had sex with her past boyfriends. Yes. I love how this is spun into punishment. You aren't punishing anybody, you are simply making decisions based on what's best for you. But because of solipsism, it *must* somehow be about her. I can pay over $100 for a steak, or a few hundred for a meal, at a nice restaurant. I'm not paying that price at Chili's. Am I punishing Chili's? Do I refuse to pay hundreds of dollars at Chili's because I'm insecure or only think with my stomach? No. Chili's has a certain expected quality, and everyone before you is getting the same price. Every woman seems to think her snatch is the $100 steak, when they give Chili's service.


Wherearethepeopleat

>I can pay over $100 for a steak, or a few hundred for a meal, at a nice restaurant. I'm not paying that price at Chili's. Am I punishing Chili's? Do I refuse to pay hundreds of dollars at Chili's because I'm insecure or only think with my stomach? No. Chili's has a certain expected quality, and everyone before you is getting the same price. Man thats right on target


manfrom-nantucket

If she isn't ready to have sex with you then move on. Plenty of women out there, remember guys there is no such thing as a golden pussy.


omegaatlas

I’ve said before and I’ll say it again if a woman gets pumped and dumped it’s because she’s not good enough not because men don’t care about relationships. Men have a higher sex drives so don’t mind fucking down but still want a relationship with a woman of a class. Making a guy wait doesn’t guarantee a relationship in facts it makes him more likely to dump you because you made him jump through hoops.


TrueStorms

Waiting clearly helps women avoid the pump and dump to begin with.


omegaatlas

No man of substance will wait for a chick especially if she’s fucking other dudes in the meantime or she slept with other guys early


TrueStorms

You’re again measuring male value by what other men admire in men and not by what women want.


DP8414

What women want is universally the same: A physically attractive, high value man. What men want in a woman is for her to desire us and be sexually attracted to us. We compare ourselves to other men because if other men got the exact same chick into bed early and we didn’t, then those men are obviously objectively superior to us, usually in the looks department. So, we move on to a woman who is actually attracted to us and will put out when we want them to, which is early in the relationship. In this context, there’s nothing wrong with measuring our value by what other men want.


Jakes1967

>A man shouldn't have a problem waiting for sex ladies, if he does, it's definitely a red flag. Horseshit >I say this as a man. Congratulations >I personally waited for my now wife, for about 2-3 months to have sex with her. She wasn't ready and I was respectful of her boundaries. It ended up as the most loving relationship I was ever a part of. We didn't wait and were at it like rabbits on date number 2. This didn't let up until our children arrived 5 years later, for that time we couldn't keep our hands off each other. >Keep in mind that if a woman wants to wait for sex, it can definitely be because she's worried you'd move on quickly after sex. So her wanting you to invest into her, is completely understandable. Fair, but if she's had casual relationships, where she didn't wait to have sex, then she's selling a "free gift" and any man who buys it, is a fool.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jakes1967

>The last statement sums it all up. Precisely, you have to invest time and money to get sex, but the other guys just showed up? Thus sex in that relationship is now completely transactional and weaponised. From personal experience, by the time she's ready, I've already friendzoned her, believing that she's not romantically interested in me. This happened at least twice and damn they were surprised and pissed, when they were ready and I said no, we're just friends - by that time, they were long paying 50/50 for any "dates" we went on.


painting739

Your last statement summarizes it perfectly and is pretty much the crux of this issue.


Jakes1967

>Your last statement summarizes it perfectly and is pretty much the crux of this issue. Exactly and I've seen and been in, way too many relationships that imploded due to the waiting bullshit. After "Waiting" for a month or three, you've already invested a damn lot into the relationship and then you get what, lukewarm sex at best?


AbsolutelyNobody0

If a woman wanted to wait until marriage to have sex and a man dating her broke things off because he is unwilling to wait that long, would you still say it is a red flag with that man? Is he now excluded from being a genuinely good person that wants a stable long term relationship?


Laytheblameonluck

My wife did the same (made me wait 3 months) but years later we had a dead bedroom and I can't shake this thought that I should have seen her making me wait as a red flag. Let's be honest, it's not really the start of a passionate, sexual relationship when a woman says she wants to delay having sex with you because she's unsure if you are a player and she'll fall for you. The guy isn't a player, so why do it? The actual logic is because they did it with other guys, and while the sex was good the relationship was bad, so you then have a marked increase of falling into the "sex is bad, relationship is good" camp.


dbz19

Did she have sex with other guys before you? Honestly this is my biggest fear, not gonna lie. I dread the idea of marrying a woman who spent her 20’s having sex with guys she saw as attractive, then settled down with me because I’m “safe”, but doesn’t have the same sexual attraction towards me because I’m boring and inexperienced, then her libido dies and we never have sex again. It’s genuinely my biggest paranoia and ultimate nightmare scenario. I know I’m not as sexy as other guys out there or even most guys, I don’t want a woman who has no sexual attraction to me because she knows what it feels like to be with much sexier men.


Laytheblameonluck

It's not your fault women do this, we are being gaslighted by their post-feminist Madonna-Whore complex, we are internalizing it. Don't you think, it's rather ironic that in the 1970s, feminists wrote stuff like this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Female_Eunuch Men are being asked to internalize women's misandry - men are either good at sex and bad fathers or bad at sex and good fathers.


dbz19

It's funny when I was a kid, we were taught about Germaine Greer at school like she was some feminist icon and pioneer, and then when I grew up I found out modern feminists hate her. It shows that there isn't really one thing called "feminism", but it's just a loose umbrella description.


Laytheblameonluck

Yes, this book was influential yet feminists deny it now, even though the evidence of it's influence remains.


Fraptrizzel

It's stupid advice.


[deleted]

Who cares what they did with other guys? It's not really what it's about. The logic you're looking for is that women will make rules for guys they aren't into, and break rules for guys they're into. So by marrying someone who started off by making rules for you, you married someone who wasn't really into you. Hence the inevitable dead bedroom. So that thought of yours that you can't shake, definitely do no try to shake it. Cause it is the absolute truth. That's your gut feeling learning from experience. Listen to your gut feeling. And next time, go for the one who takes you up her ass on the first date. Well...sort of.


revente

Any self respecting guy cares if a girl hes dating was a whore.


[deleted]

>Keep in mind that if a woman wants to wait for sex, it can definitely be because she's worried you'd move on quickly after sex. So her wanting you to invest into her, is completely understandable. You mean like the previous men, who she had sex with quicy. I mean sure you go ahead and martyr yourself whose stopping you 🤣 even advise women that guys who won't wait is a red flag, anyone should have whatever preference they want and are comfortable with, BUT if you're a guy, I don't see why you wouldn't just fuck any of the ample available alternative women who won't demand waiting/fuck them while "waiting" for the other girl


januaryphilosopher

There are plenty of women out there who didn't give it up quickly to other men either.


cmchunk

My first gf and I waited 9 months, we were both virgins. We dated 2.5 years. The next guy was 7 days after we broke up. 60 days later at university, her and 3 other roommates who were women, had a sticker/calendar system set up to brag about their exploits. 🤷🏾‍♂️


januaryphilosopher

It probably took her that long to be comfortable with sex as a concept rather than sex with you in particular. After she started she was just cool with it.


[deleted]

Well on the other hand at least she was a virgin in the waiting


[deleted]

As the old line feminists used to say "have to treat all MnMs as poisoned". In a time like this, there is no way to reliably know if a girl made every guy wait, so it has to be assumed that there is at least one guy a given girl didn't make wait, and decide whatever you're going to decide accordingly.


ScarAdvanced9562

I feel like that is perfectly sound, but I doubt its a majority, and its hard to suss out who


Wide-Illustrator2906

I wouldn't say plenty, there are some but they are definitely in the minority, since most women have had casual sex at some point in their life.


purplish_possum

I'm not about to wait. If a women's into it great. If not I'll just move on. Why would I stick around on the off chance a woman will decide someday to have sex with me?


Ou-tis

Is she virgin? If she had a lot of sex before you and she make you wait it means you are not hot or a catch for her.


ogsimpology

She was


buffin-big-bowls

Depends. Waiting 2-3 months if she’s genuinely not ready for it yet is understandable. But guys should know their worth to not get played like a kazoo


midwestufohunter

If you’re getting played by spending time w them it’s already not a fit. If it’s a burden to date them… don’t date them.


buffin-big-bowls

I agree. Women just be playing sometimes


midwestufohunter

Are men ever not playing tho


buffin-big-bowls

I’m sure we do, but man we get played a lot, probably moreso


redheadbeauty15

I'm curious how you perceive a woman's motive for playing this way? Maybe I am just not friends with manipulative people but what do you perceive waiting as a play for power. what does it get the women?


buffin-big-bowls

Validation and attention among other things I guess? I’m also not friends with manipulative people but I know they exist


BassPotato

Validation, attention, free food etc etc


omegaatlas

Yeah 99.9% of women aren’t worth “just dating” and not having sex


Chaddamhusein

I hope she sees this bro


Wide-Illustrator2906

Men aren't monolithic. There isn't and shouldn't be a standard regarding sex for men. If you are okay with waiting for sex, then good for you but other men have different beliefs regarding sexuality.


PopularBug5

Nope, I also say this as a man. So what if a man waits for him to have sex with you? He can always have sex with other ladies in the meantime. You think he has no access to OLD? What makes you think if you swiped right on him so quickly based on looks the other ladies wouldn't as well? What makes you think that like you the other girls who fancied him also don't feel like going for a quick hookup? You need a much better vetting metric than waiting or not waiting for sex to qualify a man.


dbz19

Because you’re assuming every guy is the type who can get multiple women at the same time. Most guys probably would either have to choose between being with their current partner and waiting, or being lonely and single again.


[deleted]

If it's just about patience/dry spells better to pay a hooker to fill the dry spells


KJ1017

Eh. Nobody who has the libido I have is waiting months. If their libido is nowhere close to mine we are incompatible, and mine is insane. I’ll wait three dates as a formality, but I’ve found people who wait months are gamifying the dating process, or not into sex enough for us to be compatible.


wtknight

>Keep in mind that if a woman wants to wait for sex, it can definitely be because she's worried you'd move on quickly after sex. So her wanting you to invest into her, is completely understandable. Completely understandable but not acceptable. If she’s been having sex with other guys quickly then why shouldn’t another guy expect the same treatment if this is what he wants? If he’s not getting that treatment, then why wouldn’t he want to choose another woman who is willing to have sex with him sooner? I don’t see how it’s a red flag for a man to want to be treated the same way that a woman treated other men whom she was attracted to.


throwwie234

Why all men just assume that all the women "have sex with other guys quickly"?


CatoftheBanals

This is one of the weirdest hard lines on here. Every man just insists every woman has casual sex. Not been my experience but ok. The women who have casual sex are trashy and aren’t worth anything, they say. It comes through in these comments even when it’s not said directly. The women who don’t have casual sex also aren’t worth anything, it’s clearly stated in this sub. Why are these men even straight?


LotBuilder

As long as you are cool with him casually dating others then that is fine.


redheadbeauty15

I assume this is the norm, when you're casually dating it's assumed they also are casually dating.


LotBuilder

You would think, but there are people during their three month wait that expect you to be just waiting on them. That’s not realistic


redheadbeauty15

No it's not realistic and fools can be fools I guess.


ogsimpology

Why? That's extremely hurtful.


LotBuilder

Because you are not in an exclusive and monogamous relationship. You are waiting to see where things are going to go. By the time you guys connect, meet and then actually behind your arbitrary 3’ish month waiting period it may cost him 5 month of half a year to “potentially” have a relationship with you? He is supposed to be celebrate the entire time in case you decided you really like him? He is supposed to cut loose all past partners and FWB to spend a quarter to a half of a year hoping you like him and hoping you are sexually compatible when you do choose to give him a shot? Honestly that’s pretty arrogant and greedy in your part. If you want to date the man and be exclusive then do so, but if you are unwilling to do that then you shouldn’t have a say as to what he does with others. And vice versa with women. If you are not going to make her your girlfriend, you can’t then try to dictate how she behaves in her other relationships.


Beginning_Proof_2160

Also a lot of women will trick guys into waiting for sex while smashing other dudes, i literally had a girl once say I'm dating a guy, and I asked her why are you sleeping with me then, and she replied because she doesn't want to seem easy for him, An eye opener experience there, and Yes i DM that guy after couple of days and said to him she's not worth it bro


[deleted]

"Oh he isn't my boyfriend, he just buys me stuff and takes me out to dinner, he is wrapped around my little finger" - Some Essex Girl "Yeah we are married, but it dosn't mean anything" "Its a girls weekend, I'm sure my husband knows what I get upto, he hasn't complained yet" Why the fuck do people need TRP, learn game, then women do a damn fine job of RedPilling you themselves.


Saitama1993

Some people are blue pilled to their core, even after seeing this shit lots of times. Red pill does a good job explaining this even from a scientific perspective.


StacksFifthAve

So how did that conversation with the guy go?


Beginning_Proof_2160

well, as most of the blue pill guys would react lol which is defensive and still think that she was an angel, honestly i regret for telling him but he looked like a nice guy so I felt bad for him at first


StacksFifthAve

Yeah, thing about that is, that awakening is really something that they have to undergo for themselves.


ChiBron86

If a women is truly into you, then she's not waiting PERIOD Men should start playing this retarded game too. If a woman's withholding sex in the name of oh-I-just-wanna-make-sure-you-are-truly-into-me, these men should also cease to pay for all dates in name of oh-i-just-wanna-make-sure-you-aren't-just-using-me-for-my-money. Let's see how long she withholds sex after that.


ComplexProjection

And while you were waiting, she was getting railed by chad, trying to secure him without success.


shrickertt

heavily disagreed. there are people who want to engage in relationships who also don't want to wait for sex. simply saying that someone who doesn't want to wait doesn't want to be with someone doesn't add up. beyond that, if the last guy didn't have any restrictions placed on him regarding sex, then you shouldn't have any either. mate, just say you're the free meal guy and move on.


VulcanSummers602

The thing is a lot of guys have this issue. She'll sing your praises, tell you how awesome you are, you take her to dinner, pay $200+ for the date to that place she raves about, takes two bites, then asks for a no-go plate. You drop her off at home and no kiss, no hug, no handshake, just an "ok thanks", and she runs off. Then the next morning she's on social media bragging about how she got laid. She's making you wait and making you jump through hoops for sex and then feeding HIM with food you paid for! And I'm supposed to be happy to wait?


FimTown

My wife and I waited to get married to bang. We decided that together because religion. We were CONSTANTLY pushing that boundary - heavy make out sessions, some oral and I'm not gonna lie, some "just the tip" moments. This was mutual and if I'm honest, it wasn't me pushing her head down to my junk during that engagement. We've been married a long time now, fuck like rabbits and have a pretty great life. The waiting is about desire, or the lack thereof. That desire was a constant, burning affair for us. So ya, it can work. I can totally see how it could be a problem though. We're both good looking so maybe it's as it always is: rules one and two apply to this.


ndkdodpsldldbsss

I don’t have a problem waiting. But I will keep looking elsewhere during the embargo.


RPslimjim

If you had other viable options, you would either wait for here while still having sex with the other women/ plates, or you’d soft next and forget about her all together. Women who know other women want you will gladly have sex with you on the second or third date. Every time I’ve waited more than three dates to have sex with a woman I’m pursuing, the sex has been less than stellar. Some of the best/ longest casual relationships I’ve had with women, we had sex on the first or second date. Men, if you are better than the average man (this includes salary, appearance, social status, network, and dating history) you do not have to wait longer than 3 dates or a month for sex.


Ohyarlysmiles

This is ridiculous. It's not a red flag to refuse to wait past like 2 or 3 dates for sex. Let's analyze your formulation of this canard, because it was a good one: >Keep in mind that if a woman wants to wait for sex, **it can definitely be because she's worried you'd move on quickly after sex. So her wanting you to invest into her, is completely understandable.** So, the solution to a woman believing a man would move on quickly after he's had sex with her is for her to *utilize her sexuality and negotiate a transaction for it*. You said it yourself --- she demands investment for sex. The entire relationship, when negotiated in this way, frames sex as *something she gives* *in exchange for enough \[investment\] tokens from you*. That means sex likely will be utilized as a bargaining chip in the relationship --- past behavior predicts future behavior. Sex is not something she gives in exchange for investment from the man. Sex is something she gives to the man in return for the man giving her sex. Only if sex is given in exchange for sex, can a genuine connection beyond that form. Otherwise, the man is incentivized to engage in deception to get sex. Why isn't the solution for the woman to cultivate other virtues that she can offer besides sex? >I personally waited for my now wife, for about 2-3 months to have sex with her. She wasn't ready and I was respectful of her boundaries. Have you ever considered that exceptions prove the rule? It's true that in certain situations, there are valid reasons to wait for sex that are unrelated to underlying fundamental problems regarding mutual attraction, healthy relationship frames, etc. But those aren't the norm. >If he takes it as you not being interested in him, **even though you're making it clear you are**, it means he was just trying to get laid. Yes, that situation is definitely *not the norm.* \>80% of women who engage in this 'waiting for sex quid pro quo for investment' game do so while also fully expecting the man to fully pursue, initiate, and escalate without much in the way of return effort. Because 80% of the time, it means just that --- she isn't that interested. >Vet properly, and allow for good men to shine, while fuckboys run away. This is also simply incorrect on inspection. Any man --- good or bad --- who is attractive will have sexual options. Fact of life. A woman who is attracted to a man but decides to pull a 'investment more and more' act will see only these results: (1) Good attractive man has sexual options and just explores those rather than jump through hoops. (2) Bad attractive man just enjoys conquests and knows this is just a waiting game and will say all the right things to get what he wants, whether it's date 3 or 10, and then -poof- (3) Unattractive/less attractive man has no other options so will gladly play along with this. As you can see, the only men that she is screening in with this approach are either bad men or less attractive ones. That's not saying *exceptions and outliers* don't occur. Let's assume you're a (1) guy and she did this. Awesome, it worked out. And it worked out *despite this approach*, not because of it. So no, it isn't a red flag, there's good reason to take the viewpoint opposite yours.


midwesternMD

Hard disagree. I don’t think it’s a red flag. She’s free to make a guy wait because she thinks he has to “invest” in her. I’m free to move on because I’m not going to engage with someone who will weaponize sex like that. One of the critical (though certainly not only) factors in compatibility is sexual compatibility. I’m not going to waste my time/energy on someone only to learn that our libidos are totally mismatched, doesn’t enjoy xyz that I enjoy, etc. Sure, you can *try* to discuss sex topics to gauge that compatibility, but the litmus test happens in the bedroom. Much the same way as you can *try* to discuss living preferences, but the proof is on how you actually cohabitate. So in my opinion, it’s not a red flag to not want to wait. But it may very well be a sign that the two people are incompatible. But blanket red flag? Fuck no. That’s absurd.


insertcredit2

It's like saying "If an employee isn't willing to work for no pay for 6 months at my company it means he's not really interested in working for this company" The reality is the company isn't as special as it thinks it is and there are plenty of companies that are as good/better that are happy to pay their employees and no do stupid loyalty tests.


LUCKYMAZE

Women don't make you "wait for sex" if she finds you attractive, max she's gonna make you wait is 3-4 dates. Let's be realistic. Would you make a girl wait for sex? If you knew she wanted it? No, you wouldn't... the same for women. Unless they want to use you they're not going to make you wait


Standard-Logic

Stupid, trite moralistic garbage. As if most women have personalities that are worth having to put up with for some meaningless sex. How about this. A man shouldn't have problem waiting for sex with a genuinely great woman. Problem is most women, even the utter trash on this subreddit, believe they are a genuinely great women.


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CimZim

Exactly this. For some of us it's not a decision to wait despite already having a desire to fuck, it's a need to wait until we have a desire to fuck.


DesperateTraffic3164

That’s the point. Who wants some broad that takes 3 months to work up a desire to fuck you when she’s open to sucking cock on the first date with someone else? Everyone wants to feel desirable. Men should respect themselves enough to walk away from a bad deal but are usually brainwashed by the potential for pussy.


CimZim

>That’s the point. Who wants some broad that takes 3 months to work up a desire to fuck you when she’s open to sucking cock on the first date with someone else? Yes, that would indeed be shitty...except it's not what I'm talking about. Using myself as an example, I had a lot of trouble dating because I need time to build up an emotional connection with the guy I'm dating so that I'll be comfortable having sex with him. I was a virgin until almost 24, because it took me that long to finally find a man who had that patience and didn't leave after date 3 because I didn't put out. My comment *wasn't* about women who are willing to fuck on date 1 with Dude A and then wait until date 10 with Dude B. My comment was about women who 100% always need to wait until date 10, no matter the dude. >Men should respect themselves enough to walk away from a bad deal but are usually brainwashed by the potential for pussy. Sure, if they don't actually enjoy dating the woman and are only looking for quick sex, it is best that they not waste anyone's time and move on.


MeteorFalls297

Yeah that's fine. But almost always, the same woman jumps into the bed with Chad after 15 minutes of talking. It's easy to see why men don't trust them in this case.


buffin-big-bowls

True, but on the other hand some men need genuinely need to know their partners are into them by having sex


CimZim

And that's absolutely fine! They just aren't compatible with women who need to wait, so although it hurts they should move along and find a woman who is capable of quick sex.


buffin-big-bowls

I fully agree


CimZim

Thanks, buffin. Hope you're having a good day or Thanksgiving


buffin-big-bowls

You too! My day’s been alright, helped out my extended family move into their new house and then played basketball with my younger cousins and may or may not have accidentally broken my neighbor’s outdoor lamp 🙈


CimZim

Lol glad to hear the majority of the day went well


NoMarriageNoKids

My only issue with this is she was likely with 20 other guys who didn't have to wait. So, because she sees long term potential (providence) it's time to play chaste.


[deleted]

Yep


AnActualPerson

How would you possibly know this though?


[deleted]

In current year, odds are there's at least one guy she hasn't made wait. So have to proceed on that assumption and do whatever you would be willing to do under those circumstances. It's like the old line feminists put it "treat all MnMs as poisoned"


NoMarriageNoKids

My extensive dating experience. None made me wait. Even my ex wife. The longest she lasted was 1.5 weeks.


redheadbeauty15

He doesn't because it is not common for women to make men wait for the past 3 generations. The reality is that women who wait will wait regardless of how into the person they are, the girls he's with just aren't those kind of women.


[deleted]

It's common to selectively make some men wait


redheadbeauty15

I am advocating for the women who wait regardless of the man because of sexual boundaries, they won't budge. Men like to frame this as such a cruel thing but I don't see how it displays any lack of true interest, it doesn't mean you don't want to fuck the guy.


[deleted]

It's irrelevant whether it is "cruel" or not "cruel" it's just not compatible


poppy_blu

I hear you OP but remember who your primary audience is here. Desperate men who rarely ever get a shot at having sex with a woman. The longer she waits the more desperate and mad he’s going to get because she might ghost him before he can sleep with her. This is one reason I might have waited a bit if I liked a guy. Not because I was afraid he would dump me after. Because it weeds out the desperate ones with no other options. Tldr; nothing signals pathetic to woman more than a man begging for sex and/or getting mad when he doesn’t get it. I literally can’t think of anything that dries my panties faster.


reLincolnX

That's why men should still keep fucking other women while waiting for the other to make up her mind. That way the man isn't begging her for sex and she has all the time she needs to make up her mind with a man who isn't desperate for it. So that makes him even more attractive to her. Of course, the dude never tells her. Win-win for everyone.


poppy_blu

> That's why men should still keep fucking other women while waiting for the other to make up her mind. Sure. You haven’t made an exclusive commitment yet. Its not about making up my mind. Not sure what I said that made you think that. Also waiting a couple of dates builds the sexual tension which makes the sex that much better. Seriously if a man can’t wait 2-3 dates, he’s likely the desperate beggar I was talking about who hasn’t closed in who knows how long if ever. Or he’s married.


reLincolnX

I agree with you that a man should be able to wait 2-3 dates. And I also agree that a couple of dates builds the sexual tension. However, we are not talking about waiting 2-3 dates but 2-3 months so that the woman can make up her mind about you. It's not at all the same thing.


poppy_blu

Fair enough


Luciansleep

However some just like sex quicker and there’s nothing wrong with that.


[deleted]

Nah brah. I've had a few women declare they weren't ready to have sex but were interested in them and I honestly felt like they were just going to end up dragging me along and wasting my time. Then there were some times where I felt like my pride was wounded. Either or dating ends. And I was definitely not just after the boots, I don't actually have casual sex so when I make my move, we aren't talking first dates. I actually date women to get to know them not countdown to sex.


Im_The_Daiquiri_Man

Q4OP: what did you do during this “waiting period”? - Fuck other chicks while you waited? - Beat off to porn? - Endure Blue Balls 1 is really the only acceptable scenario imo. 2 is bare minimum 3, I would question your T levels tbh. IMO, there’s nothing wrong with “waiting” as long as things are escalating and sexual attraction is *crystal* clear all along.


PlayfulLawyer

>Keep in mind that if a woman wants to wait for sex, it can definitely be because she's worried you'd move on quickly after sex. It CAN be, but these days it can also be that you're getting played like a sucker >If he takes it as you not being interested in him, even though you're making it clear you are, it means he was just trying to get laid. Actions > her words, it also just means that he may not want to waste his time and that he has options and doesn't feel like getting strong along for 3 months >Any guy I know that is genuinely a good person, and wants a stable, long term relationship, waited for his girl to be ready. 🤣🤣, well if we're going down the route of personal anecdotes there's numerous examples of long-term relationships I can point out where the sex was on the first night or in the first week or so, including my own marriage🤷‍♂️ And don't get it twisted yeah a guy maybe just trying to fuck but if a girl makes you wait the way this guy is saying, there is a good chance that you could also be getting used for your resources and time, and possibly your status depending on what you do , don't get caught out here slipping Men view women as sex objects, women view men as SUCCESS objects, don't think you're immune from getting played I always tell you guys on here if a girl is a virgin or if she has a body count of like one or two both in the confines of a relationship, THEN maybe you can look at waiting as a more serious option, but if she's lived a little, had some casual relationships, fuck buddies, maybe even some one-night stands , and she tries to pull this simp "Steve Harvey told me to wait 90 days" method, if you're a guy with his shit together and has options don't deal with the bullshit like this, on to the next one because more than likely it is NOT going to be worth it , I say this from experience, even though we've all gotten a little older and Jaded by modern dating and things of that nature, there is nothing like being with a woman who genuinely desires you and lusts for you Happy Thanksgiving guys, more stuffing less simping


Perseus_the_Bold

The math here is so easy even a MGTOW Monk who doesn't date can do it! **If a man actually loves you then the compulsion for sex takes a back seat to his bigger priority which is** ***you.*** When a man cares he will not have sex as his priority. But a warning: DO NOT shit test him on this! The second a man detects any whiff of manipulation, mind games, or bullshit he will walk and he will be pissed. So how does the sex happen? Easy, he will not pressure you into it. He will seduce you into it. When a man loves you he wants you to get aroused and ask for it, to get you in the mood and to want it.


ClownNamedBel

So what your telling us is your wife played you☠️


LackOf_Empathy

So what I'm getting from this is that although she's not meeting my needs I should still be meeting hers. That is ridiculous, if I'm ready for sex and she is not I'm just gonna move on to someone else, I'm not gonna wait for her to have intimacy with me.


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fantasticfantasy69

I just popped in here to see what kind of fuckery was going to be discussed given the subject matter and I have not been disappointed gents! 😂Not for nothing but OP’s user name is u/ogsimpology, so this point of view isn’t out of character apparently...


Luciansleep

Look some guys probably prefer a woman that’ll have sex quicker or doesn’t see it as something special. There is nothing wrong with wanting sex early.


NexusNeb

Pick me


AreJewOkay

I say this as a man. All men are different. Sex can be very important to a relationship to the point where bad sex can be a dealbreaker. Why invest 3 months into someone only to find that you are incompatible sexually and have to break it off anyway? Not all men are trying to pump n dump women. A sexual person may want to see how compatible they are with their partner before committing to that long term. This is not nefarious or an indication of a “bad” man. It’s ok to have preferences and a preference can be a partner who is good at sex. Women will do this as well and will ghost men if their dick is small or their stroke game is weak. Is that wrong? Maybe she wants a man she is more sexually compatible with. Different strokes for different folks. It all depends on how important sex is to you in a relationship.


TrueStorms

Question: did you hook up with other women in the interim?


Lameador

Who are those sex ladies a man should wait for ? Escorts ?


JacobMoogberg69

Lol, I have never waited more than 3 dates for sex. And once I got tired of it, I started making it clear to women that I am not the type to wait for it, I'm not the type to be their boyfriend, take them out and take care of them. I'm there for one thing only, then I never had to wait beyond one date.


SteveSan82

How old was she when you met her?


ithinkoutloudtoo

She will make you wait if she sees you as marriage material.


M4sterDis4ster

If she made all men wait for sex, then no problem. If you are the only one waiting for sex, then longterm she is digging a huge hole to fall in.


jasonology09

Gtfoh with that. I have no issue with waiting several dates for a woman to have sex, but 2-3 months?! That's absurd! One of the main reasons to date someone is because you both are sexually attracted to each other, to purposefully deny yourselves of the very reason your seeing other in the first place makes no sense whatsoever. That's like going to restaurant, and seeing how long you can look and smell at the food w/o eating it.


Insidious-Sid

Did you wait 2-3 months for every gal you fucked? Or just your wife? And do you consider "all those other women" lowly sluts compared to your virtuous wife? And when did you go from being a fuckboy to a "good man"? When you met your wife? I mean, you're on a pretty high horse here. So we need to ask a few questions to make sure you're not just virtue signaling, white-knighting, and kissing up to women. You know what makes me a real man? Not anything you think. That's what.


[deleted]

If you like sex why would you wait? It is just a shit test.


LiftSushiDallas

I don't want a man who is willing to wait months for sex because that's lame to me.


DeliciousPussyNectar

This is some super beta energy


M_LaSalle

>If you as a woman are looking for a genuine relationship, make it clear to the guy that you like him (if you do), but you're simply restraining from sex because you want it to be a meaningful and serious relationship in the future. So the deal is that the guy has to court her and spend time on her, with no sex, and no promise of a meaningful relationship except maybe some time in the future. There's a word for guys who take that deal. Sucker. I'm not paranoid that she's having sex with Chad. The issue is that she's not having sex with me, and in meantime I have to spend money and time that I can never get [back](https://back.No). No way. I do not do celibate boyfriend. For anyone. Ever. Even the most obnoxious of Red Pill assholes don't expect the woman the show up at the door when he arrives wearing a see through whatever and to show him to the bedroom. Of course he's going to wait for sex. But for how long? I'm happy that you're happy with the wait of 2-3 months. (Was it two months or three? If the story is true I'd expect the guy to remember, but that is neither here nor there. Then again I can't remember breakfast this morning, but that too is irrelevant) Telling guys to wait for sex is basically, as far as I'm concerned, meaningless virtue signaling unless you put a time limit on the wait. If you say wait for sex three months, then my answer is not just no but hell no and I suspect I have a lot of company. I won't wait past three dates. Every man has a time limit, and a man who doesn't is probably too much of a pussy to get much in the way of sex anyway. Women aren't notably attracted to men lacking in self respect.


Fentonious8

If a girl told me she liked me but she's just waiting so that it can be special, I would assume she's banging another dude on the side and it's just using me for whatever


ogsimpology

Super insecure... Jesus